Today I went to the gym and trained legs, which went really well. I managed to hit weights nearing my best, even though I am at my lowest body fat and body weight. I’m just so focused at the moment that I believe I have full control over my body. My goal is simple, to do what I want to do without any outside help at this point in time. I plan on pushing myself to see where I can get to without any outside influenced goals. This allows me to be in control of my own challenge without the pressure or any help to get where I want to get to. I know exactly where I need to be, I know exactly what I need to do, I’m just going with the flow, enjoying it and plodding along.

I know that this sounds very egotistic, but I do have my heart into it and I am trying as hard as I can with the knowledge I have at the moment. I enjoy challenging myself and I get motivated from challenging myself. I do my weekly check-ins which I monitor body fat through skinfold calipers, weighing scales, tape measure, photos and I practice posing because I want to explore and understand every aspect of the sports. I enjoy posing or trying to pose due to the fact that it gets my mind connected to the muscles. When I first started posing I wasn’t doing it correctly because I didn’t have my mind in connection with the muscle. practice posing has helped me tweak little things, which is allowing me to utilise that knowledge and work the muscle group better in the gym. Again this is just my journey and how I’m doing things, it might not be right but I am enjoying it. I feel better in myself and that is all that matters.

I’m in a happy place right now, even though I don’t hold much muscle, I am lifing half decent weights in the gym and my mind is very focused. More importantly, I feel fit and healthy. There’s so many things that I have changed in my journey that I sometimes forget. Not drinking alcohol for over 4 years or so was something that was impossible 5 years ago. This life style is easy compared to even thinking about stopping drinking. That was all I knew from early teens and drank for over 10 years.

The good
1/ I feel happy
2/ Enjoying the challenge
3/ Getting more experience through running tests on my body
4/ I’m in control of my body
5/ Lowest body fat level
6/ Strength and focus are good
7/ I know my goal
8/ Visible abs perminantly
9/ Fat George is non existent
10/ It’s only me against me

The bad
1/ Giving it 100% (to my knowledge) is hard work
2/ All my chill time is food prep time
3/ this is pointless as I’m doing it for myself as a challenge and challenges are meant to be… Challenging.
4/ Feeling flat

Now let’s get some things straight. I’m in MY best condition on a personal level. I would never consider competing with this much fat on me, however I’m not sure how much water I’m holding. This is something I can practice with over the next few weeks until I’m happy with where I am.

Why ain’t I bulking to get huge?
It’s not my goal at the moment. I’m in a very happy place with what I’m doing. If I was competing and had a set date then I would be all out building muscle and stressing. Again, this is my journey and I find eating and lifting very easy and enjoyable. Lifting and dropping the fat is extremely challenging, and that’s what I enjoy.

Skinny…

Yes I feel skinny, but I need to fulfill my personal goals before I try to put on size and I want to enjoy where I am right now… Also my diet will be more fine tuned for me and a clean bulk should be easier. I’ve tried diets I’ve read online and in magazines and I’m surprised I haven’t ended up in hospital trying to follow them.